having their cake and eating it too.

Don't misunderstand me, I love cake. However, I hate being lied to, or not being lied to so much as duped and made to play the fool. The Fox network strikes me as a brazen company that feeds the buck-toothed American public with the television equivalent of fast food. You've all heard of those bullshit shows like WILDEST COP CHASES CAUGHT ON FILM!!!! It's like, how many more fucking cop chases can I watch? If you've seen one, you've seen them all. Instead of releasing the hotly anticipated CRAZIEST RAPES EVER CAUGHT ON CAMERA!!! they stuck with shows that I feel are very good but have betrayed me this season- House and Bones.

House- House is a good show because House is a genius and a prick. If he were just a genius the show would suck. Anyway, this season was pretty inconsistent altogether but I leapt for joy when House and Cuddy (who, by the way is the finest looking Jewish woman over 40 on television) finally fucked. This was a storyline that had been simmering all season. I had been reading about it all over spoiler sites and blogs (yes, I do love a good spoiler). The episode after they bang sees House trying to get Cuddy to acknowledge their tryst but she doesn't even react. He doesn't understand why until near the very end of the episode when we are made aware that the final, squeal-inducing scenes of the previous episode had all been a fucking hallucination. House and Cuddy didn't have sex, in fact, that whole thing was a hallucination caused by Vicodin addiction.

Fox - 1 Viewer - 0

Bones- Bones has been great this season. The chemistry between Booth (David Boreanaz) and Brennan (Emily Deschanel - GORGEOUS) has been slow building (a couple minutes at the end of each episode is devoted to sort of furthering their love) and incredible. It's obvious these two have strong feelings for one another and they play it in a very believable way. A sex scene between the two was promised this season and hyped and spoiled at least once a week on the blogs. So when Brennan asks Booth to impregnate her, via a sperm sample, he has to confront all these feelings in one of the most touching episodes of television I've ever seen. Soon Booth starts hallucinating - oh, fuck, here we go - and seeing Stewie from Family Guy (another Fox property. Hey, synergy). At the end of the penultimate episode of the season we find out, along with everyone else, that Booth has a brain tumor. Operable and benign. Thank God. It should be noted that I fucking wept during this episode. Cut to the finale, every role is reversed and it's quite obviously a dream. Oh, of course. Anyway, Booth and Brennan are married and very, very in love. There is a sex scene. Oh joy of joys! But we know this cannot last. At the end of the finale, you find out that Brennan has been writing the annoying voice-over that bookends the episode as sort of a love letter to an unconscious Booth. A Booth that has been in a coma for four days, which seems pretty light as far as comas go. Brennan is overjoyed. The man she loves was in danger of dying and now he's awake and fine. Oh, except he's lost his fucking memory. This is a fairly blunt 'game changer.' Something that will invigorate the show with new life. Booth won't remember anything about his love, Bones, until probably halfway through the next season, whereas Bones will suffer and pine for Booth until his memory comes back. Good one, Fox.

Fox - 2 Viewer - 0

This feels like betrayal because they know that fans of this show have been waiting for a Booth/Bones hookup since the beginning of the show and House/Cuddy fans since at least season 3. And the thing is that both shows promised to deliver on the sex in their finales and while they did so, they immediately took away the warm and fuzzy feeling that accompanied it. It's like what's been happening on Smallville since the dawn of time: Clark will expose his secret in one episode and by the end of it he's used a ring to go back in time and never make the same mistake again. The shows offer fans a taste of what things could be like and then yank the rug out from underneath them. It's bullshit. But it's understandable bullshit. I would love Bones even if Booth and Bones hooked up because I'm sure they could make it fresh, but there would be no more anticipation. And without the sexual tension between two main characters in a television show, you may as well hang it up because I think that's what people tune in for. I know that the last few minutes of every episode of Bones is my favorite because it offers the most character exposition and it's where the heart of the show is. Don't get me wrong, I'm still pissed and annoyed, but I can also understand it. We all know Booth and Bones will end up together in the end, though the verdict is still out on House and Cuddy.